My Favourite Poem

Inua Ellams 'Candy Coated Unicorns And Converse All Stars'

Its true. Watch out!

Be Amazed...

LANA DEL REY- VIDEO GAMES

Embrace Life

Always wear a seatbelt. This advert won Best ad of the year. Its beautiful, Says everything without actually saying it.

Darwin Deez - Radar Detector

Im not that keen on the song but I love the camera hat idea. Ka-ching! Someone should sell/market/brand those bad boys. Could use video cameras aswell.

LoL

BOO! Mwah-ha-ha

Sex For Your Ears

...or just the track which Ive had on repeat for the past few days. It sounds messy and shouldn't work but it does. Love it. Jai Paul - BTSTU

I Fucking Knew It

What were they thinking!

This is an actual logo designed in 1973 for the Catholic Church’s Archdiocesan Youth Commission. It even won an award from the Art Directors Club of Los Angeles. Amazing.

Jokes ting

I want it! I want it! I want it!

This cute little guy is an Egyptian Tortoise aka "Kleinmann's Tortoise". He is the size of a grape (probably not an M&S grape, maybe a more normal sized Tesco/Asda/market grape). This one's name is Tiny Tim, he was found, along with a small litter, by HM customs last year after some git's tried to bring them into the illegal pet trade. Tim is living the slow life at Whipsnade Zoo in Bedfordshire where him and his mates have their own apartment and specially made electronic wheelchairs (kidding). Ironically the slow species is now extinct in Egypt, and nearly the whole world : (
HELP SAVE THEM! Im going to do my best and see if I can buy one on eBay, preferably in Blue to match a pair of shoes I have just brought.

Wendy's Son!

Scare Your Dog Shitless

I unfortunately dont own a dog, (if I did I would have a Pug. PUG LIFE!) but I must have one of these. Such a cool idea. Your dog wont step out of line ever again. And once your dog is too scared to even look at its own tail, you can start using this invention on passers-by. They'll love it!



Povodokus sports a gun-shaped handle, which retracts the leash when you need to control your target dog. It’s a sure shot! The lead goes out freely as the dog pulls and reels in when you pull the trigger. (Designed by: Art Lebedev Studio)

Hoodwinked!

A great little film. Its the classic story of Little Red Riding Hood, with a twist. Very funny and has a cool soundtrack which even features Ann Hathaway singing. Give it a watch, and I hear they're making "Hoodwinked Too" out later this year. (The goat song is the best)

Clever

Its a bit cruel to force all the other trees to watch and be reminded of what happened to their tree friends, who were cut down to make this contraption.....but it is a good ad. The tree's are thinking "that could have been me!"

And I thought Leo drew it : (

Boob-Sweep

For all your hands-free cleaning needs. Get on it girls.

No hair whipping. But this is the shit.

R.I.P Mr Pringle

Look Who's Talking

-Dude I got so fucking wasted last night!
-Bro you were all over the place
-Why do you only have one sock?
-Shit dude, I dont even know
-Ergh dude your breath stinks
-Yeah I should so not have had all those jaeger bombs
-Im never drinking again!
-Me too....But seriously where's my sock?
-Whatever man, I need my nappy changed and like a gallon of milk

Amazing Talent

Budge-a-Board only $5!

This is the sort of commercial I would make

Weird and Wonderful

What an Effort

Wwwhhhaaaaa?????

Should Have Gone To Specsavers

After just seeing this advert on the television, my uncle asks my dad;
"What would you do if Elaine (my mum) mistakenly kissed a stranger like that?"
My dad says; ".............Il'd take her straight to specsavers.' Such a romantic.

.....so this is why I dont play tennis

Adverts Control You

Does that mean the females have one?

She-male Sharks.......I hear they'e the deadliest

Great Cover

My New Favourite Artist

She's a modern artist with some bad-ass canvas skills. Kimberly Dawn Clayton (google her) produces some beautiful artwork, that I managed to stumble across. Her paintings are so colourful and bright. She also makes sculptures out of junk and turns it into masterpieces AND performs while painting live for concerts, festivals and charity events, (who doesn't?). Apparently many celebrities and one ex-president owns pieces of her work, Im not trying to big her up or anything. But I do want to own one of these beauties one day.



This last one is my current wallpaper.

Zombie Book with a Twist

This is a trailer for the book 'Warm Bodies' by Isaac Marion. This book is different from your average Zombie flick/book story-line. It's main character is a zombie called R, who cant remember who he is, or why he is a zombie. He comes across a girl and instead of eating her he decides to save her. Im going to read this book, it sounds good unlike your usual 'zombies are the bad guys' books. This shows they still have feelings. So when zombies do take over the world, just chill out and give them a chance .....they're just hungry.

LOL

The new KIA ad with Kurtis Blow- classic tune. It makes me laugh every time. "ergh.......the nappies"

Gangster Beetles

http://www.youtube.com/blackbeetle

Eeeewwww

“A restaurant in London’s Covent Garden is serving a new range of ice cream, made with breast milk. The dessert, called Baby Gaga, is churned with donations from London mother Victoria Hiley, and served with a rusk and an optional shot of Calpol or Bonjela. Mrs Hiley, 35, said if adults realised how tasty breast milk was more new mothers would be encouraged to breastfeed. Each serving of Baby Gaga at Icecreamists costs £14.“

This is disgusting, I mean £14 for ice-cream??? I wouldn't mind the shot of Calpol or Bonjela, but Ill pass on the breast milk thanks.

Because we're Special!

The Black Hole

Be careful, dont get too greedy!

The Black Mamba

Kobe Bryant is the Black Mamba. Short film by Nike with some big names; Kanye West, Bruce Willis, directed by Robert Rodriguez.
A Nike Basketball Production. They have gone all out on this one. Good short film with some funny bits.

"Hero's come and go....but legends are forever."

ITS NOT PORN!

This is a short film I made with a few course mates whilst at uni. (Just found it again) We were given the idiom "Better to be safe than sorry" and had to create a story from it. The film is quite graphic, but the shock technique works.....I think. Anyway it was fun to make, and the couple in it are still together!

This is what my parents told me...

We're going to Disneyland!

I couldn't find the UK version of this ad, but the concept is so clever. Disney launched its new campaign on Sunday, in the UK. The tagline is "The magic begins when you tell them". The ads were created with real, family home videos of parents telling their kids in different ways. I love the idea because my parents surprised me with a trip to Disney World Florida when I was 9. They told me we were going to Portugal, (not that going to Portugal isn't cool) I just wasn't that excited. We were in-line to board the plane and im thinking 'why are there so many americans in the queue?'. My mum tells me to check the tickets, which say Orlando Florida. Took me a while to clock on, but eventually I reacted as if I had just won the lottery. Its a great idea, and I am definitely going to surprise my kids the same way.

Got Milk?

So WHY are we still drinking boring old white cow's milk, when we could be drinking a strawberry flavoured Hippo milkshake???

......it's pink it must be strawberry flavoured.

Shut-up & Drink it!

If on Crack, Dont Kodak

I found this article about the Do's and Don'ts of nights out, here's a part about those lovely friends who decide to take photos of you at your worst.
"The camera is not your friend, it’s a bastard enemy. Why do people choose the evenings when they’re at their most ugly and stupid to spend the night pointing cameras at themselves and each other? Round these people up and leave them to die on an island. A twisted mouth, one eye rolled back in your head, mascara and eyeliner applied like bruises beneath sweaty hair on a prostitute’s red face and clothes stained with every liquid in the room isn’t a look that needs preserving in a digital format for strangers to view on the internet for all eternity."

Also...(from personal experience of my lovely mates capturing our nights out...) I find you end up looking like a surprised meerkat who's been caught having a fit in the middle of the dancefloor. You've also been caught singing along to whatever song was on, but in the photo it looks more like a disabled lion attempting to roar. And then you spend the next day on facebook, having a good old Untagging session.

Should you have gone out? Would you do it all again, and wear the same shoes? YES.

Important to Know

RASTAMOUSE !

(The bastards put the video under infringement, so here is the YouTube link: 'RASTAMOUSE'

This is the best kid's show since the 90's. Rastamouse! He will probably haul together a bobsled team in later episodes. Mi gon fi watch dis whole episode now. We all know what type of Cheese these rasta's are after...

Texts from Last Night

Yes Im abit of a late one, and have only just heard of this site, www.textsfromlastnight.com basically people uploading drunken messages from the night before. Here are some examples of the magically intoxicated messages:


*I just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...

*Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out,
about $1000 more

*So I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

*I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

*Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

and my all-time favourite!

*and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

nighttime DAYTIME!

If your computer can handle it

Check out www.kokokaka.com to see the best interactive graphic site. Its for Wranglers new clothing collection, BlueBell. You can bully this poor guy around with your mouse, rip his shirt off, drag him across the screen, its a bit mean actually. But brilliantly done, with a funky song on repeat.

Incase you ever get the urge....

How to get McFired

Click>Getting Myself Mcfired

This guy gets jobs at fast food restaurants and sees how quickly he can get fired. Funny stuff. He even invents the McNificent Burger! McDonalds first ever burger with chicken, fish and beef. (weird how it doesn't take off).

You must have had your arm stuck under a rock to not have heard of this one. Beautiful song from a beautiful film. Such a chilled song to have in the background of your whole life. Or when you're looking though someones photo album play this song, the holiday will seem alot more memorable.

The Wizard of Oz: Munchkin Suicide

Yeah it does sound depressing, but there is a myth around the film that one of the famous munchkins actually committed suicide whilst the cameras were rolling. AND even worse...no one had noticed, so it had been put into the final film edit. Apparently you can see the figure of a small person hang himself behind the trees, in the scene in the forest. Just before Dorothy and Co. go skipping away singing 'We're off to see the Wizard!..."



According to the urban legend, the munchkin resorted to suicide because he feel in love with a female munchkin, but she didn't feel the same way, (what a bitch). So he decided to end it all, right there, live on set. The film was made in 1939, wow, and in the first original print you can see the munchkin figure hang, but in the new edited edition they have shopped in a big bird. Ive seen the bird and its huge, and so out of place. They're definitely trying to hide something.

MEGATRON!!!

P-P-Penguin Prostitution

Thats right, one of the worlds most oldest profession isn't just limited to humans. I've just found out that some Penguins, from certain species, will whore themselves out. Even if they've found their 'life-penguins' a few females will have a quickie for pebbles, (to builds their nests). So the next time you see a penguin showing off its nest on MTV Cribs, you can guess what the lady penguin did to gain so many pebbles.

No one knows yet wether there are Penguin Pimps. Then again, how hard can it be to P-P-P-Pick up a Penguin.

Chill Back and Listen

Amy Winehouse - Valerie (Slow) by smithers_mr@yahoo.com

Fancy a ride?

This is a fairly new poster by the mayor of London, to get more people cycling.
Sex sells...........where's my bike?

If you can believe it...

I had to find out if this way true.....apparently it is.

A woman claims she's now the legal owner of the sun after registering the star at a local notary public as being her property.
What's more, 49-year-old Angeles Duran from Spain says she now wants to start charging everyone on the Earth for using it. While an international agreement states no country may claim ownership of a planet or star, Duran says there is nothing stopping an individual.
As such she says she's now the rightful owner of the sun and wants to charge anyone who uses it, in a bid to raise money for the Spanish government, research, ending world hunger… and herself.
Speaking to El Mundo, she said: "I backed my claim legally, I am not stupid, I know the law." --- Wow, where do you start?
A document issued by the notary public says Duran is "owner of the Sun, a star of spectral type G2, located in the centre of the solar system, located at an average distance from Earth of about 149,600,000 kilometres".

INSANE